i can't believe i had my finger in that
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
