Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
