They should really pass out barf bags in church
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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