There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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