Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
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