Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
