theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
