My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
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