We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
