the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
