New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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