her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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