You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
