under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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