I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
