i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
