I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
