I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
