Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
too bad you live with your parents still
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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