Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
