Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
