Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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