my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
