I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
