he was CRYING into my vagina
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize
