just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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