We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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