# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
