Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Help. Why am I so naked?
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