I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Do you still have your period?
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
im holly from the hills drunk
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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