What a fucking waste of an outfit
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize