My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Watching her eat just hurts me
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
How drunk are you?
Completed.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
