im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Randomize
