i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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