how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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