I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
