She is in my trunk
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
