Best friends brother. Beat that.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
