Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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