i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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