Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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