Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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