I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Randomize
