whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Found the puke drawer
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Randomize
