No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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