no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
