I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I am one with the molecules
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize