Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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