she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
