Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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