I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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